Sunday, September 5, 2010

I'm a Selfish Person

My running days are over, at least for now. I haven't run since August 8th. My reoccurring left knee pain has returned, and despite doing everything I'm supposed to do to remedy the situation, it continues to hurt. Running just isn't possible right now. I joined the gym where I was going for P.T. 3 months ago, and continue to work on strengthening my lower body, and now recently my upper body. I'm actually running/participating in a "Warrior Dash" on September 19th in upstate NY, 150 miles from home. That is, if my knee will cooperate. My daughter and her boyfriend are also running in it.
I honestly have to say that I don't read your blogs anymore. For now it's too painful. It's too painful for me to read how much fun all of you are having running, how well you're doing, and the races you've completed and are training for while I can't run. Selfish, yes. But I'm being honest. I miss each and every one of you, I really do. Some of you are friends with me on Facebook, so at least we know how each other is doing, and I appreciate that. So, my plans are this. Go to my doctor, have him send me for an MRI, and then depending on the results of the MRI, decide what my future holds for running. There's an annual race tomorrow, Labor Day, that's 12.4 miles. A co-worker is running it. It's going to be a perfect day: 75 degrees. I've run in it every year. This year I'll be home feeling sorry for myself instead. This sucks. I want to run...I want to blog about my running, and most importantly I want to stop being so selfish and stubborn and read your blogs and comment on them. OK, I'm done. PLEASE let me know if you're running in any races in the Connecticut area (NY, Mass., etc.) in the upcoming months. I do want to support you. I do want to be sociable. I do want to read your blogs and comment on them. Time heals all wounds. I will be back. I WILL run again. You can count on it. Thanks for allowing me to vent. I love you all....

12 comments:

lindsay said...

i know how you feel. when i am running-depressed i don't want to read about "yay just had a great 20 mile run!" and all. i hope you can find a remedy for your knee so you can run again, even if you have to stick to shorter distances. might wanna cut back on all that beer intake though so when you do run again it's not too hard ;)

Leelee said...

I am glad that you are my friend on FB, otherwise I would be worried that you were in someone's trunk...I am so sad that you aren't able to run...your "magic" playlist gets me up so many hills and encourages me to last one more mile...my blogs not about running, but I do get encouraged by the running reports of others and can imagine it is difficult to read when you have been sidelined...I am hoping for the best about your knee and will always miss your running reports...so excited when your blog popped up today...you are missed!!

Iron Mike said...

When I was sidelined back in May, I was pissed off at the sight off every runner I passed on the road.
They were probably likewise pissed off that I was in a comfortable automobile.
Continue doing what's best for you, your family, and your precious legs. If you end up doing the Warrior Race, have a great time, it looks like a cool opportunity.
Even without the Labor Day race, enjoy this beautiful weather, which is more than enough to make us happy to be alive.

Meg said...

Hey, Rick! I'd been thinking about you this week. I'm so sorry for what you've been through. NOT fun. It's hard to stay connected when your CONNECTIONS are about the thing we all share and love; running! However, YOU are not running, you are Rick and we miss you and have fun following any of your FUN and raucous adventures. Keep up the funny stories and don't hold out on us, I KNOW they are there! HUGS, meg

onelittletrigirl said...

I so know how this feels- and I was JUST having a convo with my mom today on the way to my race about how hard it can be to read how fast others are, how they all seem faster than me and how injured runners are having an easier time getting back at it. It does hurt. I am sorry you are sad. I hope you are not sad soon.

ajh said...

I'm not running right now although I am hoping it won't be for long. Jill and I have been emailing back and forth comparing heel pain stories. I know what you mean about the blogs. When I read I didn't run today because I didn't feel like it I feel it is rather unfair! Take care.

Anne said...

Nice to see a post from you Rick :)

I do understand...and although my knee pain has not yet stopped me completely, it is still there and I feel the precarity. Hopefully, you can find an activity you enjoy enough to do until running becomes possible again. Because, you will be running again!! Do take care and hope you had a great Labor Day weekend!

Staci Dombroski said...

Sorry to hear that it is not better! I hope that you have a great week :)

Whitney said...

Sorry that you aren't running anymore. I'm not either, but that's what comes with being 7+ months pregnant. I know that there is an end in sight and in the mean time, I'm trying hard not to be jealous of all the runners I see. I hope that you will be back soon!

Jill said...

If you read my blog, you'd know it's not all fun and I'm not racking in the miles - so you shouldn't rule out all blogs. Hang in there, get healthy, and you'll come back stronger!! I'm going to do the same!

Cynthia O'H said...

Rick, I'm so sorry that you are on the sidelines for a while. A friend of mine has been going through the same thing since Boston. He made a switch in health care (moved from PT to chiro) and ran his first 10k yesterday. I know how anxious he was and I'm sure you are feeling the same.
Take time to heal, explore other fitness avenues and take care.

Laura said...

Rick, I am so sorry to hear how depressed you are about not being able to run! Best of luck with the MRI, and hope you got through Monday okay. (In some ways, not running is like a breakup... just gotta take it one day at a time!)

I will be running Hartford next month... will miss your company on the course.